Disclaimer**
This has nothing, no relation to the "30 day challenge" on Facebook. That is a pathetic waste of your time. If you are in fact participating in the 30 day challenge, I encourage you to replace it with this one.
Enjoy.
I want to I guess, "fall in love" ( that sounds really weird, not gonna lie) with God. Right now in my Christian walk, I feel pretty lost I guess. I will admit, I go through the whole mountain valley, high on God one week, cussing like a sailor, not caring about God the next, and that's what I want to get out of I guess.
To me, I guess it's not so much about my actions. When I get down into these "spiritual ruts", I don't go off the deep end physically into sin. The big thing with me, is the state my heart is in. I get so apathetic to things, to the God that had enough grace and mercy to save my life, and I find myself honestly, just not caring.
Friday night, a bunch of us got together, and studied God's word. It was cool to see I guess people my age so passionate about God, so passionate about growing in their faith, so energetic, so selfless, to becoming a disciple of Christ. Well, being in the rut that I am, and being the natural goof that I am, I found it necessary to ask about 789 questions. These questions though - - they actually led me somewhere. I have longed, for I guess about 5-7 months now to "fall in love" with Christ. I hear people talk about it, I see people around me overflowing with this abundant joy for Christ, but yet I only possess it about 1 every 4 or 5 weeks, often after an awesome church service or something. Four days later, whatever happened to that passion? Where did it go? It eats at me, it gets me, and it makes me I guess hunger for it.
So I'm searching, have been for a while, on what needs to take place in my life, in order for me to fall in love with Christ. What took place Friday night was kind of strange. We were praying at the end of the night, individually. Everyone around me was just all "whoopty do I love Jesus". Not me. My state of mind, "whoopty dhoopty lets go sleep". I just wasn't feeling it. My two dear friends, Hannah and Becky came to pray with me, they knew I have been struggling, and decided to lift me up in prayer. They prayed, then it came my turn. I couldn't speak. I didn't know what to say, I didn't want to say anything. After about 35 or 40 seconds, I finally said a few words, than continued on being apathetic. Then about 10 minutes later, my brother came to pray with me. This is when I actually felt God pulling at me, I began to pray, for real this time. I just opened up to God, told him literally everything on my heart. It sounds maybe small, but it was a pretty powerful experience for me, just because I was being so defiant, so selfish, so pathetic, and yet God STILL got a hold of me.
So, after all of this, I am challenging myself. 49 days, without stopping, blog about God. Express how I have seen him in my everyday life, in my prayer life, in creation, in anything really. I was told once that once you begin to see God in some things, you begin to see him more and more, in everything else. The other part of the challenge is pretty simple; very, very important however. 1 Prover, 1 Psalm, and 1 Chapter of a book in the New Testament. It's impossible to grow in your relationship with Christ if you aren't actively seeking to spend time with him. Without that, this challenge is pretty useless.
here goes nothing....
Today I went out riding with my boys Eli and Chase. Talk about fun, man it was a blast. There is just something about being on a four-wheeler riding through what I believe is one of the most beautiful places in the world. The views were spectacular -- here's one I shot driving home.
I know this is probably your typical, "God made a beautiful" sunset, answer, but seriously -- just stop and look at that picture. The mountains in the background. The sun setting casting pink, yellow, and blue hues across the mountain landscape. Could that all have just happened by random chance? No way.
Another way I guess I have seen God move is in my prayer life. Imagine that. Earlier this semester the idea of transferring schools to switch majors became a very real opportunity. It has been a tough decision. I love love love Liberty University, the people, the atmosphere, but I also need to be studying something I can do for the rest of my life, something I can't find at Liberty. I got some clarity, some sanity on the issue this past week, and for the first time in a while, I feel fairly at peace with my options.
Finally, I have seen God in quite simply, his people. I couldn't tell you the amount of people in the past 3 days that have really set a great example. I see God really living through them, and I see God pouring out of them, and that is awesome. That is the lifestyle I want to live.
'til tomorrow, deuces.
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